Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Randomize
