with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
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the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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