so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
