lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Randomize
