Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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