it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
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Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy