Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize
