If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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