yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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