Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
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