My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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