Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
