so explain again why im purple
no
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize