i jhust puked up my retainher.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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