Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
