Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Randomize
