I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
