did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Randomize
