Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize
