I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
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