it wasn't lemon gatorade
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Randomize