I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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