Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Randomize
