I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
