Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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