He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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