if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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