This girl is more easily done than said...
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
