Are we in a gay sports bar?
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Randomize