I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
