Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
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