i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
