At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Randomize
