I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Randomize