I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize