i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
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