So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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