is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
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