she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
It's not a walk of shame if you run
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Randomize
