Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
