i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
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