Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
