it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
