Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
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