I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
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