I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Randomize
