Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize