Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
There's always time for handjobs
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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