ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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