This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
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My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
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I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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