is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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